You Wanna F me? Well, F, You, DB!

I love that very few people check this out. It's nice to think that if someone waltzed on by they'd stop and think, "Who is this dork?"

I had a lovely conversation with a guy I used to screw around with. I'd friended him on FB after knowing and screwing him for year. He has a boyfriend now and he posts pictures of how happy he is, ziplining and skiing and such. And then he writes me one day out of the blue:

I thought, "WTF?" You dirty ass-clown! Cheating, lying, filthy, mangy bastard.
So I wrote him this:

I was trying to be nice. Notice I blessed him? And I totally removed the part where I said I feel terribly for his BF having to be with a cheating asshole like him.

I guess I've grown up a bit. It's not that I was aiding someone in cheating on his boy friend. It's not even that he was being pushy about the rules he wanted to enforce. I deserved better treatment. And I have half a mind to post the actual chat on FB and call him out on it. But I won't. I'm greater than that.

God is good.

Gaining What I've Lost

So, I've bounced back a bit.

I lost 108 lbs but I've gained 30 back. It's disappointing but I guess it's not all bad. I've found out a few things:

I'm allergic to dairy. There. I've said it. And it's not like: "I'm allergic so I puke," allergic. It's far more sinister. I get nausea, sure, but then the gas begins. It's not that it's just uncomfortable. It's not just that I fart a lot. It's that the gas smells like a double-dealing, back-stabbing, syphilitic whore-rodent died and is rotting in my bowels. The oozing corpse is infesting my intestines and burns on the way out. Wait, let me try and paint a clearer picture for you...

So, there's that. And, I'm not sure if I'll have a job at the end of next week. Fun, huh? I might have a job but still be on the chopping block. I also might have a job and not be on the chopping block. But I just might have to start filing for unemployment and at least I'll have a small break, right?

But, I am happy. I really am. Not everything is sunshine and roses. I remember saying one day, "It takes a lot of rain to make you appreciate the sunshine. And it takes a ton of horse-shit to make a beautiful rose garden."

Maybe I'll become a hippie and get high all day and join a womyn's drum circle. I'll braid hemp bracelets and sell incense in OB. See? I have options!

Here I Go, Here I Go, Here I Go Again...

I'm finally off on my own now. March 15th I moved into my very own place and I'm loving it.

It's strange to not have another person coming into chat, cook, watch tv, But, I am enjoying the solitude I'm experiencing right now and I think that's the richest part of my journey.

Here's my little Shangrila:

Such an oasis, huh?

Well, truly, it's wonderful and I'm glad to be at a place in my life where I know no matter what I can be my own man and person.

I love the building, too. It's most gorgeous at night. Here's another pic:

I love coming home to such a pretty building.

Things at work are stressful, but I know I'll manage. Just taking everything day by day.

Miles and Miles and Miles....

It's been a while but I've had such an amazing time.

First off, there have been changes afoot. I'm in my own place and loving it. Of course it's day 2 and I have a ton of unpacking to do but it's nice to have a place all my own.

It's a cute little studio and I'm close to everything.

I've completed my 3rd 1/2 Marathon. So far it's been life this:

-Disney World 1/2= 3:01:45
-Death Valley 1/2= 2:48:00
-San Diego/Petco 1/2= 2:40:18

And here's some pictures!

Yup. That's me doing something I never thought I could.

As far as weight loss. I have finally settled into the 2.20-ish range. It's a nice weight. I would like to go lower and stay lower but I think this is where I need to be right now. And I'm glad I can manage it.

Other wise, life is good right now.

That is all. :)

And the Date Goes On

8 months until 40! And, I've got a bunch of stuff to do.

First off, I'm phasing off of Optifast. I'll have 8 weeks of maintenance and then monthly meeting for a few months. I've been at 205 for a few weeks now and just hanging around a 3 lb range up or down. It's nice to be a weight that is so low and be able to maintain it.

I ran the Disney World 1/2 Marathon.

 3 hours, 1 minute, 46 seconds. And that brings me to 1/2 Marathons:

February: Death Valley 1/2
March: San Diego 1/2
April: La Jolla 1/2
May:
June: Rock-N-Roll 1/2
July:
August: America's Finest City 1/2
September: Disneyland 1/2
October:
November:
December:
January: Disney World 1/2

Just have to find 5 more and complete the full year, but I'm excited! I'm ready to run and get to 40 with a bang.

Then there's dating. I'm back on the market and I've been on 2 dates. One cancelled the other... well, he was really awesome and I'm excited to see him again. That said, I know I'm single and available so I'm not going to settle down too son but I'm sure excited to be out again and meeting people.

2012 has started and I'm here blogging about how much weight I've lost. I'm also restoring my iPod because it's starting to fail big time so I have a mariachi band tooting every 30 seconds as the equipment shuts on and off.

I've looked over my last few years and have seen how invested I've been in things that get me no where. Also people. An old friend of mine came into town and like the last few times he's come in I find out last minute and there's a party being thrown. He likes to tell me about this the day before and I usually have plans or I have to go to bed early. So, it's his loss.

I also found out that a good friend of mine has been coming into town regularly but I've never been told. And, as much as I would love to say these people are crappy I have to take a moment and ponder what it is in my life that I've done to be the guy you don't want to tell when you're heading into town.

But I digress. I go to Disney World on Monday and I took a few minutes to look over my posts from August until now and to think of all the things I've done is quite remarkable.

I'm down to 203 lbs. I haven't had a drink in 20 weeks or a cigarette since February. But I think the biggest accomplishment I've made has been to forgive myself and forgive my past.

My big bro and sis-in-law come in on Sunday but I fly out Monday morning. We'll just miss each other, but I go knowing I'll be in the better, cooler more awesome place and they just have to suck it up and deal. (Just kidding. I mean, yeah, I'll be having fun but they'll have unrestricted access to Mom & Dad).

One last thing: I switch to nights when I come back. 3:30 to 11:45 PM. We'll see how that goes... .

It's almost Christmas.

It's the 2nd "Day" of Hanukkah.

But, most importantly, it's Winter Solstice!

And that means we have 366 days left before we all die in an apocalypse. (Leap year, wouldn't you know...).

I'm finally down to 209 lbs. I've lost 102 lbs since August. I've started to eat again: protein. Tomorrow I start veggies and then next week I get to try salad stuff.

I've really worked hard and I need to keep running and exercising. I'm starting weight training in January and I think I'll have the body I want before I burst into flames and the earth collides with the sun next year. We might all be doomed but I plan to go out looking fine, y'all.